For those who read my last thread, I believe there are two coherent ways one can choose to interpret my official departure post.
The first is that I am a morally weak person/hypocrite that can't even keep his word when he says he's leaving an internet forum, partly in protest and partly to move onto what I perceive are better things (in the relative sense, that is particular to my life situation as it stands. This is for those who believe events in the universe proceed suddenly or happen in a sudden manner.
The second is that it just marked the beginning part of an on-going process, starting with a formal declaration of intent to dis-engage my participation here, upon which I would gradually follow suit with my actions, and on the condition that I felt everything that needed to be said and answered was said and answered. This is for those who believe events in the universe proceed suddenly or happen in a sudden manner.
Both have some truth to them, in my view, but all of you are welcome to see it the way you see fit.
This essentially marks the fifth thread -- and very much intended to be final -- number of AMAs threads I have done over the past three weeks (counting this thread which contains also contains part I, II and the prelude, the sum of which have gradually morphed into an incremental series that have given me ample opportunity to reflect on not just whether or not I'm going to make this decision, but why exactly.
I understand that this point there are very few questions left to ask, so I'd like to ask to use this as a platform to not just "Ask Me Anything" (among which I expect questions like, "why haven't you already left yet?" and such) but also as a means to "Tell You Something" about me, as I the past few threads have left me with the sense that many or some people came to interpret my departure announcement as being entirely about my misgivings about the state of the forum (and by extension a way to ostentatiously flip the bird to everyone who feels this this place is perfectly alright on my way out, especially /u/ewk and his followers) rather than being about my personal life independent of this place -- which at the moment is going a major transition phase.
If you are not interested in hearing more about me personally, I advise you to ignore this thread entirely, as that's what it'll mostly be about (rather than "Zen" proper). I promise I won't be offended. Plus, you'll save yourself some time. Maybe save me some time as well, if you're going to be asking me questions that will only serve to obligate me to further justify why I'm leaving this board.
I also wanted to use this thread as a way to express my sincere thanks to all this who wished me well in my departure (and promised to keep me updated on the state of this sub) as well as to anyone who I have learned more about the nature of my self and others (whether it directly pertained to the formal discussion topic of "Zen" or not) through our exchanges -- yes, /u/ewk, this even includes you! Though I think the side-effects of your medicine still outweighs the positives, and you should spend more time R&Ding it than dispensing it in its current form. If nothing else, I hope this post at least in part goes to show that there are people in the world, who even though you disregard them as dishonest cowards/frauds afraid to have their deepest beliefs questioned, are still willing to do 5 times as many formal AMAs as you :P, and that you should probably do more of them yourself if you continue to ask others to do them, especially, if like me, you've said you've never not been available for people to ask you anything at any time (which if you'll remember, is why at one point I was adamantly opposed to the idea of doing any AMA at all). The demand is clearly extraordinarily high, and I'm sure there would be less misunderstanding and argument involving you overall if you took the time to formally AMA again. What do you have to lose?
In any case, to spare awkward redundancies, no more farewells are needed. Even if this post gets 0 replies, all your love and well wishes have already been well received on my end. Metta in advance to all of you! Thank you again. If there was a question I didn't answer in a past AMA, feel free to ask again. I feel like I made a tactical error by posting the departure thread on a Tuesday, after work, not anticipating the onset of exhaustion halfway through, which left me feeling like I left some bases uncovered, which I generally don't like to do. This time I'll have today and tomorrow at the very least to wholly dedicate to answering/replying/sharing my final thoughts marking over three years of participation, which hopefully will not take too much after the pattern of a relapsing internet-Zen-forum junkie, or otherwise a form of self-indulgence :P I am sincerely hoping and planning that this thread will be the last.
Peace and Love
Submitted August 20, 2016 at 03:32AM by nahmsayin http://ift.tt/2b75aXK
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